Oh, I see we had a couple hours of downtime, and you’re already planning our funeral? Fascinating.

First off, let me clarify the concept of uptime. We operate with a 99.95% uptime commitment. Now, if math isn't your strong suit, let me help: that allows us roughly 4 hours and 23 minutes of downtime per year. We’re basically a surgeon with a perfect record, but hey, even the best slip on a scalpel once in a while.

We had a minor hiccup – yes, an entire couple of hours. Apologies if that interrupted your marathon shopping session, but let’s put this into perspective. Unless you’re some sort of night owl entrepreneur, I doubt this changed your business’ trajectory.

And as for ‘grabbing money and shutting down’... it’s cute that you think I’d bother. If we were really out to fleece you, trust me, you’d be none the wiser. But here we are, addressing it head-on. So go ahead, grab your pitchfork—or better yet, check your facts next time.

Thank you for your concern.